Migrant Tales Literary: If you are a Finn

 

If you are a Finn, what is a Fonn?

Was your flag blue and white, or was it lilac and yellow?

Sorry, what was that again? Sano säki mua suks?

Or was it san snää mnuu snuuks?

So who hates who in this mnuu snuu, I wonder?

 

So, I am the maahanmuuttaja.

There is only one of us, after all.  — Ha, you wish!

I am a mover of countries, apparently!

I see that my country certainly moved with me!

Was I a ulkomaalainen! Or was I a tulokaslaji?

 

A Finn…

sweats to get clean

swims in ice to get warm

drinks vodka to get thirsty

stays silent to communicate

 

Still, it’s not all contradictions.

Finns sleep. Finns clean their teeth. Finns talk (yes they do!).

Finns laugh. Finns smile. Finns walk (oh, and Finns pooh!).

 

Finns.

You know, people from Finland (or was that Funland?).

Finns.

You know, where the cocks crow a bit funny, like “cock-a-coockle-coo”

Finns.

You know, not Swedes. Oh, but wait, some of them speak Swedish, too!

Finns.

Tree lovers. True lovers. Nature lovers. Lake lovers. Because love is quite unique to Finland, don’t you know!

Finns.

Because F comes before G, and I comes after H, and N comes after M and oh, that, once again, and then S comes before T. And then, finally, we’re done.

Finns.

Because there is something extra special about Suomi.

Sacred, even!

 

So if you are a Finn. What am I, then? What am I to you?

Someone else, not a Finn, not so lucky, perhaps?

Not kin, to a Finn. But born into a dustbin. Just, someone “…from somewhere else!”

 

Do the birds in Finland know that they are Finnish?

That they are special?

Why not? – someone should tell them. Hey, suomalainen lintu – kuuntele!

Sä oot erityinen!

Every one of you! And the worms you eat, too.

All special. Loveable. Valuable.

Cos your Finnish.

 

I’m not a Finn.

I guess that means I’m finished.

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